A short list of complaints about the Manchester Christmas Markets that I am sick of hearing.

 1. IT'S TOO BUSY I COULDN'T MOVE
Last year over 100,000 people attended in the opening weekend alone, over the entirety of it's opening it was estimated that around 9 million people flocked there in turn making it the busiest Christmas market in Europe. Just out of interest I'd like to know what part of 'The busiest Christmas market in Europe' warrants people creating an illusion in their mind that  it's not going to be really really busy. Use the brain that God/Buddha/Allah/evolution gave you and do the math for yourself. Nobody likes human traffic, I certainly don't, I've never met anyone who does and I don't imagine I will any time soon. However if you're interested enough to visit the markets this year but insist on complaining about fighting your way though the crowds then there's a few really obvious things you can do to make your experience less painful. These no brainers such as avoiding it on a weekend and spending more time in the parts that aren't Albert Square will save those around you and yourself a headache. 

2.IT'S TOO EXPENSIVE

I'll admit to anyone that yes it is expensive and overpriced. The food definitely is, the drink definitely is and as I'm not a random crap type of guy so I can't fairly comment on any of the  stuff the stalls sell but I can imagine that it's the same scenario there. The annoying thing is that everybody knows this, so there's no need to keep commenting on it. Even worse than complaining about the price is making comparisons. The last thing I want to hear is someone stating that for the price of one glass of mulled wine you could have got a full bottle from lidl. If you already knew that then why didn't you bring some in a thermos unless you knew that doing that would make make people resent your presence just as much as being a Mr Whinger.   Everyone is still gonna pay the prices at the end of the day. If you really can't stomach how bad you're being ripped off then take a look around, you're loose in a city, not locked inside some sort of modern day deceivingly relaxed version of Alcatraz.   So go and pick up a Chicken Mayo from McDonalds and then walk around and soak up the atmosphere for free if it suits you. If that's even too expensive for you then kindly click the X at the top right hand corner of this window.

3. STOP SAYING IT USED TO BE BETTER
It used to be more quiet and it used to be cheaper. Yes I remember 4 years ago getting a sausage for £2.50 and being able to walk around without bobbing and weaving like I was training with The Money Team but that doesn't necessarily make it 'better' now does it. There's more stalls, more food, more booze and more people. When I first started going my friends were more interested in playing call of duty than going to the 'weird German thing' to drink beer and stare at a singing moose's head. In many ways they still are, but after having it drilled into their consciousness by the rise of it's popularity, through endless selfies in front of that Santa Claus spreading over social media; I now get to slap solitude in the face and get out of the house once in a while.

                                                              


WOULD YOU REALLY RATHER NOT HAVE IT?
All these complaints beg the question, what if it didn't exist? Wouldn't have anything to complain about then would you? In reality the North doesn't have a great deal on the South and by the South I mean just London. No matter how many times you share that '20 reasons why Lancashire is the best' article you're still not going to kid anyone. The fact that people from all over the place flock to our local Christmas market must mean it counts for something. So if you could stop with the negative energy towards it then that'd be great.

(For anyone offended this article is aimed largely at my Father)